Tag Archives: fake smiles

Dry my tears

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I tend to believe in fairy tales, unicorns, dream come true and happy moments that are remembered for life. You can’t blame me, its human nature to want exactly what you don’t have or rather what you can’t have. What I feel is like a picture worth a thousand words but something’s are just better left unsaid, unseen, untouched, unheard, undone, forgotten, understood in one’s mind not expressed in one’s words.

You ask for the truth, not in words nonetheless you demand it, and so you deserve it! Though the truth is yet a mystery, for there is no soul inside to know what the body bears, the heart feels, and the mind thinks. I’ve been stricken with proof of past wars I have fought within, behind every scar there’s a battle I have lost. These battles have become the origin of my denial. These are battles that ripped my soul apart. I never let the hurt show but look deep in my eyes. What do you find other than a shattered heart, unshed tears, unspoken words, unanswered  questions, a scarred soul and a broken girl?

I denied this then and I will continue to deny it in the future till eternity, but listen to me when I say this, I am not fine. I’m broken, I’m helpless and I need you, but you are never by my side. Nobody ever is. Who is there for me? To care for me? To dry my tears? And yet, I wait. For you, for someone. But with time, shattered hopes and a broken heart seems like the routine lately. I know you won’t come, but still I like to believe that you will. Because its human nature to fool oneself with happy dreams that may never come true.

And with the passage of time and tears, I have gotten used to dreaming. It’s makes me feel better about life, it gives me a new hope, it’s keeps me going. It’s gives me a break from the hideous reality, to escape to my wonderland Where happiness is no longer rare. So I wipe my tears, plaster a fake, but convincing smile to my face, and move one. It works every time.

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Who Is She?

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She has that convincing smile plastered to her face as she listens to her bestfriend. Her smile doesn’t reach her eyes but it’s enough to convince her bestfriend. It’s surprising how many people she lies to and how many people believe her lies without any hesitation.

She is breaking inside. It won’t be long before she bursts out crying. The pain, it’s too much isn’t it? But no, she has to stay strong. She has to keep going. She can’t let anybody find out about her breaking heart. Let them believe in her happiness. Let them be fooled. She hopes to get over it soon and move on. But her past won’t let her go. It will keep her in his grasp torturing her. Tormenting her to the extent of the patience. Forcing her to scream out loud.

She wasn’t like this. What is it that has changed her so much? How long does she hope to keep this up? This act? How long will she fool everybody? How long will it take before she finally breaks?

She can put up quite a good show in front of everybody.  She can easily fool them with her decieving smile. But she can’t decieve me. She can’t fool me. Who is she you ask?  She is the girl in the mirror. hfgcjf